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Maggie Szabo's avatar

I am a person who writes, also known as a writer.

I am also a person who cooks, also known as a chef.

I am a person who has children, also known as a mother.

I am married, so also known as a wife.

I have parents (still alive and kicking!), so I'm also a daughter.

I have gorgeous people who like spending time with me, so I'm also a friend.

I have an obsession with chocolate, not sure what that means.

So many 'hats' to wear, to be imperfect at, and to love doing. I think if we can embrace all the things we do in life, including the weirdly god-like hobby of creating worlds and people to inhabit them, it just becomes part of who we are, like freckles and eye colour.

Hey, this is me, I enjoy creative writing. Where that will take me if I keep practising is anyone's guess, but I'll enjoy the ride and gather like-minded friends along the way.

What a life.

Thanks for this post, it's refreshing to know 'all' writers get the wibblies about their work at times.

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Gemma's avatar

I’ve come across this phenomenon in relation to mental health issues also. Some people cannot move on from their trauma because it has become their entire identity and they cannot - or in some cases, refuse to - see themselves as separate from the depression/alcoholism/bulimia/whatever the issue may be. It’s incredibly unhealthy, just as identifying as your job is unhealthy - case in point being those who retire and crumble without their careers as they have no identity beyond teacher, boss, doctor etc.

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Jojo Moyes's avatar

oh how interesting x

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Erin Henderson's avatar

Ha! Also as a recovering journalist I completely relate to, “the routine, the deadlines, the camaraderie, the bleak jokes, the overwhelmed liver.” I still joke that the only thing journos are better at than getting divorced is drinking.

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Wendy Varley's avatar

Very wise advice! I’m a former journalist and have struggled to get back into writing. I alleviated the itch with diaries, but otherwise was stuck. I got too good at taking minutes! Mercifully, simply getting on with writing here on Substack is clearing the block and helping me get past the feeling that everything needs to be perfect.

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Jojo Moyes's avatar

absolutely nothing needs to be perfect. At first, anyway x

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Jon (Animated)'s avatar

Jojo, your insightful reflection on the identity of being a writer was incredibly inspiring! Your distinction between being a person who writes and identifying as a writer is just so true. The anecdotes from your journalism days and the realistic perspective on the writing process were both comforting and motivating. Every writer would need your advice to embrace the process rather than the identity. Brilliant work, thank you.

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Marple's avatar

There is a lot of snobbery attached to the idea ‘writer’ which is where I think it all comes from. It’s definitely worth thinking about seriously in a world that seems to think it gets to decide who or what we are based on whether we fit often entirely subjective criteria.

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Jon (Animated)'s avatar

So true. We can often box ourselves into a certain way of thinking and being which can be done by others to us too. This needs a mindset shift to regain some positivity

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Marple's avatar

100 percent!

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Jacqui Gatehouse's avatar

Such a fantastic post - I feel like you've been reading my mind! Having been through a 'corporate detox' over the past year - finding out who 'Jacqui' is again minus my former mental armour otherwise known as the title of Senior Vice President of Business Development - I can totally relate as will everyone whose job has defined so much of their lives for a long period of time. I'm now busy 'sculpting' my memoir as I'm definitely not a writer - your analogy was perfect.

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Holly A Brown's avatar

Thank you for sharing such wise advice! From so many years as a writer. This newbie is very grateful 🥰

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Kristina Kuzina's avatar

I’ve experienced this myself and realised it’s closer to the belief that we have to justify art. That unless art is bringing money, it’s useless. Unless art is up to a certain external standard, it’s not art. Once you realise that art is something that came into existence from nothing, it seems amazing enough to let go of success and money as external justifications. Then, you truly allow yourself to create.

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Yiannis's avatar

It was after my 4th business book that my publisher realised that I still did not see myself as a writer and promptly ask me "Why don't you see yourself as a writer yet? Your books sell well and you arre getting paid. Plus you write more than anyone I know" Honestly, I did not know how to answer. My books where something like business cards for my coaching business in my mind, but somewhere along the line I had become a writer. I had to accept that role in my mind first and it took me some time to address myself as a writer...

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The Webber Chronicles's avatar

Great article. I was also a journalist and regarding myself as a person first and a writer is secondary, amongst all the other hats I wear. Your words helped clarify my approach and the lulls in writing that happen for everyone. I'm in one of those troughs right now - so brilliant timing on your part too. Many thanks for the insight!

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Jeannine's avatar

Lots to ponder on here!

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Rose Radtke's avatar

This was exactly what I needed to read at exactly this moment. Thank you Jojo, and thank you universe x

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Charlotte (has) Baby Brain's avatar

I love this. I have a degree in journalism and have written for marketing purposes for most of my career, so I always put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect when I blog (which is what Substacking is, to my mind, none of this newsletter nonsense for those of us just vomiting our lives onto the screen) and then end up feeling like a failure because, actually, I just don't have the capacity for perfection right now, and blogging isn't about perfection, anyway, it's about sharing. I don't really identify as a writer, to this end, though I am comfortable with blogger because it feels a bit sloppier. A bit more 'writing in my pjs, doing my best but soz if there's a typo, I edit this thing myself and am blind to my own (grammar related) mistakes.' Gives a bit more license to take yourself less seriously, which also helps. Thank you for sharing ❤️

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Miranda R Waterton's avatar

This makes sense to me. I think I ran away from this precise issue for years by throwing myself into learning how to paint rather than writing. Not that I didn’t enjoy it, but eventually it reached a certain level and I didn’t have the motivation to push any harder than I was doing. Once I let go of my idea of being an artist (which included setting up a home studio I rarely used) I felt more comfortable going back to writing. Somehow I had found the ability to see it as something fundamental to my wellbeing without feeling it totally defined my identity. I’m quite relaxed about never getting published.

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Marple's avatar

Definitely a different way of being.

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Marple's avatar

I will definitely subscribe.

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Sarah Robinson's avatar

LOL, I experienced the same kind of journey when I left media, too. There's something about creative (or creative-adjacent) professions that feels like a security-blanket label. Or maybe it's just our very human instinct to want to belong somewhere, as something definitive.

I read The Minimalists' "Everything That Remains" around the time I left journalism and it really helped me start to see my work as a thing I do vs. who I am. It's definitely a process though!

P.S. My escape fantasy is similar to your donkey sanctuary, haha — that is, raising goats and/or sheep in the Alps somewhere, à la Heidi (unsurprisingly, ripped from my fave childhood book). 😜

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